Look here.
Look over there.
A million things
dancing
like fireworks
and each dazzles
for a little while.
An idea. His idea. Her idea.
A thing. His thing. Her thing.
I’m impressed. I’m smitten.
the idea, the wonder,
the glamour.
embrace it,
like it, love it
life is untwisted.
for a while, for now..
then come my personal failings
my own teetering doubts,
and then nothing
I am empty again
I am empty again,
already grasping for something new
but a little bit spent.
Incredulous,
disappointed. In myself.
a little bit less certain
craving, still
this new thing,
this new dogma
a new center to spin about
my center?
I have been spinning
loving and hating
hating, then loving
for so long -
I am dazed.
I am ageing,
I am fading
growing skeptical
minutes and hours.
No trajectory is really satisfying
no philosophy is truly mine
so I step aside
and stand on the curb of indifference,
and watch everyone struggle
Fling things at each other
watch the judgement and the righteousness
watch with relief
the spectacular simplicity -
from here at least there is a perspective
that is mine.